I signed in this morning and immediately got a message from a Jennifer something-or-other. I refuse to repeat exactly what "she" said because it was disgusting. Suffice it to say that it was sexual in nature and I was totally grossed out. This was obviously a chat spammer sex bot. I replied, saying something to the effect of "That's gross. Leave me alone." while I searched for that contact so I could remove her. (I don't remember adding her in the first place.) Then Jennifer replied saying "I know. It's totally random. It's just that my ***** exboyfriend cheated on me and I'm really horny.....[etc. etc.]" Double ew. I replied again saying something like "I'm not a man. I'm not interested. Don't talk to me. You're disgusting. Leave me alone." blah blah. And then I deleted Jennifer from my contacts. Jennifer started replying before I could get "her" deleted, so the chat client allowed one last message through. This is what it said:
"Whatever...suit yourself....you're probably a virgin anyway....peace!"
Now, let me first say that I am really disappointed in society these days. The fact that there is any such thing as (what I call) chat spammer sex bots really speaks volumes about the state of morality in our time. This generation is really on a downward spiral and I have know idea what kind of herculean effort it's going to take to save it, but I really hope things turn around fast.
When I come across people in my life who are rude or impolite or perverted (like Jennifer), I often exclaim, "Who raised you?!" And it hit me like a brick to the face this morning after my run-in with the bot: It's up to us to turn it around. That herculean effort? Yep - gonna have to be us. And by "us", I mean the people that are raising children now and those who will soon be raising children.
I never wanted my child to live in a world where "...you're probably a virgin anyway..." is meant as an insult or a dig. What on earth have we come to?? I'm supposed to be offended by that? No--I was supposed to get defensive because, apparently, being a virgin has become undesirable in our society. That is so disappointing. It makes me want to cry. And the sad part is that I was a little annoyed that I couldn't reply back saying "Actually, I'm happily married with a child, thank you very much."
Yeah. I almost went there. I almost fed off of the stink of humanity.
Was I really being defensive about being called a virgin?? I was ashamed of myself for my reaction. Things cannot continue in this direction.
So it's up to us to turn things around. We need to educate our children and be honest with them. We need to be "uncool" and teach them that it's okay to be a virgin. We need to be an active part of their lives. We need to be intrusive. We need to know who they're hanging out with and where they are and what they're doing. I'm not saying we should put our children on lock down - give them their freedom and your trust, if they've earned it. But don't allow yourself to be that parent who ends up bawling on the Maury Povich show saying, "I don't know what happened! She used to be my little angel and now she's doing drugs and she's pregnant and she's only 15! What did I do wrong??" You tried to be the cool mom. You tried to be a friend instead of a parent. You gave her condoms instead of teaching her the importance of chastity and self-respect. You ran with the thought, "Oh well--you only live once!" THAT'S what you did wrong.
It lies on our shoulders to raise a generation who knows better. It's our job to make them responsible and respectful. I believe it is everyone's right to grow up in a world where they don't have to feel bad about being a virgin. I hope no one ever has to disdainfully ask my children "Who raised you?!", but if the question is ever raised, I hope they answer proudly.
I solemnly swear to do everything in my power to ensure that my children never become sex bots.
That's a promise you can count on.