I almost broke down today. I feel overwhelmed with the tasks ahead of me. At the same time, I feel overwhelmed with my current state. But it's a "lost" sort of status quo that I'm in. I just don't know where to go or what to do. I'm faced with this huge set of tasks and goals and I don't know where or how to start getting to the finish line. Well, that's a lie. I finally got a job. I guess that's the first step.
There's that and also the intangible. The shit hole that is my emotional state right now. And I don't know why I think of it that way. I mean, on the one hand, it's totally that. I just recently broke up with Ray and he still lives here which complicates things on so many levels. But on the other hand, I have this huge weight lifted off my shoulders because of the break up. That AND the promise of a new possibility with someone back home. But I guess it's because I feel like I'm sort of in limbo right now. Aqueous Transmission (Incubus) kind of fits the mood - the music and kind of the lyrics too. But mostly the music. So I generated a genius list (I love you, iTunes) based off of that song and it's perfect.